a dark and lonely christmas ahead, im sure

So I come into work yesterday and on my way to my desk, I see what looks like a brick-size piece of petrified wood sitting on Editorial's communal table. A sheet of paper with the words "Help Yourself" scribbled on it lay next to the strange object.

I'm thinking, yeah, right, like I really needed firewood in this god-awful heat. Other than that, I dont give it much thought -- that is until maybe an hour later, when I hear someone comment its jerky that a coworker brought from a trip to Monatana.

Jerky? I've always loved the taste of jerky, but i don't eat it much because it's kind of tough. For some odd reason, however, upon hearing theres jerky around, I immediately get up from my desk to get some.

Someone had put a sharp knife next to the slab of meat. I took the knife to the jerky ... and to my surprise, the meat didn't seem tough at all. It was pretty friggin' tender, in fact. I can't say it cut like melted butter, but it offered as much resistance to my cut as maybe a block of cheese.

That was just the first of my surprises.

Not long after slicing a number of thin pieces to take back to my desk, I popped one of those suckers in my mouth. And, man, it almost seemed to melt in my mouth! That shit was tasty! smoked, but not heavy in the smoky taste. A bit salty, but again, just enough. It was by far the best jerky I'd ever had.

So I go to my coworkers cubicle to thank him and tell him how glad I am that he brought back this stuff for us.

"Hey, man," I say, "This shit's good! What kind of meat is it anyway?"

"You like it?" he says. "It's reindeer meat."

"Fucking cool," I say as I take another bite and walk away.

I'd never had reindeer meat before. If i had, it might have been called deer meat, or venison. And even then, i dont remember being this bowled away by the taste.

I remember thinking, as I sat back down at my desk, how much of a pleasant surprise eating this jerky actually was. Who would have known Rudolph would taste so good?